Sunday, March 28, 2010

Courage

Last night our neighbors had a wonderful bon voyage party for us. It was fun to see all our friends and have a chance to visit before we leave Monday morning. We were touched by the warm wishes from everyone.
So many people congratulated us on having the focus to pursue our dream and the courage to go. I have to admit that I didn't think too much of those comments at the time. After all, I've always been focused. To me, it seems like I'm doing what I always do.
Courage has been a different matter
It started at the party. I found myself looking out at everyone and wondering why we were leaving such great people. For the first time, "What were you thinking?" passed through my mind. When I voiced that to friends, they all said the same thing - go, enjoy, we'll live through you, and we'll be here when you get back.


Today, however, was an emotional roller coaster. We spent much of the day packing - weighing - packing and reweighing. It looks like all the bags are under 50 pounds, barely. The big event of the day was taking our cat, Skeeter, to his new home for the year. I was an emotional mess all afternoon.
I know he'll be fine even though he's very old and there's always the chance he won't make it through the year. But he has a great new home and he's made it through lots of previous years. Leaving him, though, brought all the many goodbyes together. Skeeter was the surrogate for leaving everyone. It made me reconsider that word, "courage". Today, I did indeed need courage. I find that I need to fiercely hold to the original vision and know that this journey is worthy. As I cried in Skeeter's fur, I wondered why all the tears - now. As is the case so many times in life, fear was the underlying culprit. So what's there to fear? Here's my list: I'm afraid Skeeter won't be here when we get back; I'm afraid that the experience won't all we've envisioned; I'm afraid we'll be disappointed; I'm afraid that we'll lose the closeness of our current friendships; and I'm afraid we'll be forgotten. And, of course, there's nothing as scary as getting what you want. It helps to write it this down because as I write it, I realize that it will all be fine - better than fine. Our friends love and support us, Skeeter is in good hands, and the experience will be all it needs to be.

So, tomorrow we leave. I'm sure there'll be more tears as we drive away from our lovely home and our neighborhood. I leave remembering this quote: Courage is not the absence of fear but acting in spite of it.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Last Days

I just returned from dinner with my four running girlfriends. Thankfully, I'll see each of them one more time so we didn't really have to say good-bye. Nonetheless, our time together tonight was comfortable and easy but with an undercurrent of change. We all knew that tonight was the last time for all of us to be together for a year, so we committed to finding ways to stay connected. I've come to realize that life is not made of big things. It's made of thousands of little things. Our connection comes from sharing the little events that happen during the course of living a day. On one hand, I fear the loss of that connection because I won't be here to share so many of those small daily events. On the other hand, I realize that our connection endures and can be rekindled with ease even if I miss some things . That 's the hallmark of friendship. I also know that it takes effort to develop and maintain friends - and that's what I intend to do.



I gave them each a copy of The Little Prince - a wonderful little "children's" book about friendship. In it the little prince learns the value of creating ties and friendship by tending to something - in his case, a rose. It's the same with friends, the more you give of yourself for your friend, the more ties are created. To paraphrase the fox - what you can see with your eyes is of little consequence; what counts are the things invisible to the eye that can only be seen with the heart. That's the way of friends. The other thing about my girlfriends, is that they will share - gleefully - this experience with me. I know they'll support me and listen with their hearts to what I say - and what I don't say. I'm blessed to have these amazing women in my life.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Final Countdown!

One week to go! It's hard to believe that, after all the time spent saving money and thinking about living in France, it's almost here. The last several days have been filled with goodbyes to work colleagues and friends who we won't see for a year. Everyone says that we'll keep in touch but hectic schedules get in the way and many times communication doesn't happen as often as we'd like. It takes effort to stay in contact with the people in your life. Maybe this blog will help.

Today was the luncheon that Mike and I hosted for my staff. It was nice to have everyone together and enjoy some much needed down time without work.
They are such great people; I'm going to miss that interaction. Each day is invigorating and inspiring. It was hard to walk through the office today and see the conversations and meetings going on and know that I'm not a part of it now. Everything will be fine, and it's a little hard, too. Soon, I'll have new thoughts to think, but the work we do in this office will always be a part of who I am.

So, it's the last week. Mike and I are spending our remaining evenings at home doing little things. Mike's last work day is tomorrow so he has a long list (that he created - not me!)of things to finish around the house on Thursday and Friday. He's been amazing! Friday night is my eveing out with my running girls and Saturday night is a party with our neighbors. Sunday is final packing (and weighing the bags) and then we're off.
We're leaving our beautiful home behind with trees just beginning to flower, perennials pushing out of the ground, and leaves emerging on the hydrangeas. The house never looked better! It's been cleaned, clutter free, and prepared for renters.



It's hard to leave but then I think about where we're going. Here are a few photos of the house in France.




It has a big dining room and nice sitting room, but the best feature is the large terrace with a view over the valley. It's perfect for breakfast and dinners, or just sitting and reading. I'm sure we'll enjoy the pool particularly during the heat of the summer.




That's it for now. There'll be much more to come!

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Our Journey to France Begins!

For many of you, we apologize for missing holiday cards but we were waiting to share our news. First, and most importantly, Mike continues to be healthy and had a clean cancer scan in December. I turned 50 this year - how did that happen?! And suddenly, there seems to be more aches and pains, but all-in-all we're both healthy and happy. Plus, Mike is retiring at the end of March. He's had an excellent career with the City of Annapolis and is ready for something new.

And that's our big news. We're moving to France for ten months! We'll take the last two months to hop-skip-and-jump our way around the world to return home. Needless to say, we are very excited. This is our dream adventure and one that we've been saving for over many years. We leave on March 29 for Europe. Wow.

We've rented a house in the village of Cotignac in southern France about half way between Nice and Marseilles and an hour north of the coast. It's a small, charming hill town in Provence's Var region. The town is surrounded by vineyards with olive trees and lavender sprinkled in. It looks like a Cezanne painting.

We're starting to pack (how do you pack for a year?) and look for renters for our home in Annapolis. It's hard to think about leaving our lovely home - but, we'll adjust! We're planning to relax, travel and enjoy the company of each other and our family and friends who visit. I've been studying French and after several years can say that I'm "basic". Turns out, it's not ideal to BEGIN a new language in your late 40's. C'est tres dificile! (And where do you get French characters for the computer?)

Our plans so far include traveling through the Black Forest of Germany, southern Spain, hiking in the Swiss Alps, the horse race (Palio) in Siena, Aida in Verona, a trip through Austria and Greece. And, of course, we'll travel around France and try to stay open to whatever may happen. On our way home, we're considering stops in Egypt, the Orient Express through Malaysia, New Zealand and South America...but that's a long way off, so we'll see what happens.

While Mike has retired, I received a leave of absence from my job. I feel very fortunate to have supportive leadership who will allow me to take this time away. Mike and I did not want to delay the trip any further but rather take advantage of our good health now. If all goes well, after our year abroad, I'll return to my current position with the government.

And so it begins. Our time to discover each other and learn more about who we are when we're not surrounded by the rest of life. Mike and I wrote about what "success" looks like for our time away. We each came up with different things but all of them point to time together, flexibilty, reflection, writing, sprituality, creativity with a little adventure thrown in. We'll write frequent updates and post some photos. Come along and join us on our journey!